You try to find a seat at the restaurant that will let you look at all the nice shiny cars. That way you won't get distracted by the annoying conversations.
You have $20 in your pocket, and you have a choice of going on a cheap date and going on a nice drive, and of course, you choose the drive.
You have dreams of fixing your own car on a weekly basis. These dreams, given your current skill set, have nothing to do with reality.
You have an old car and you have nightmares of other people trying to fix your own car on a daily basis. These dreams have everything to do with reality.
You find yourself arguing passionately about a car you have neither owned nor driven.
You think the names Dodge, Audi, and Volkswagen, are perfectly good names for your future children.
You find yourself reading car reviews at 2:30 A.M. in the morning and.... hey... wait... why am I writing about myself?
You find yourself routinely spending your weekends going to the Pull-A-Part and buying components that don't even fit your own car.
Your idea of the dream companion is someone who has a complete set of Snap-On tools.
You hear someone talking about the joys of owning their boring refrigerator of a car (usually a Camry or Prius), and you feel like shouting, "You don't know what the hell you are talking about!"
You start reading car reviews and you slowly begin to realize that these folks are writers of pure fiction.
You start noticing certain phrases being reduced, reused and recycled when it comes to new car reviews such as, "It handles like it's on rails!" and, "The X-speed automatic transmission shifted smoothly." Still you keep reading, just because it's a car review.
You wish you had a second car so that your friends couldn't get your daily driver all dirty.
You wish you had a third car so that your second car wouldn't get all dirty. And besides, who wouldn't want a 22 year old Chrysler LeBaron?
On second thought, they're no longer your friends. Screw em'! Your new friends are the three other people who drive your car in the area, and you're all thinking of starting a new club.
Your non-enthusiast friends start avoiding you at all costs because every time they see you, all you ever do is talk about your damn car!
|